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Last Thursday, we met again.  The party was smaller.  Daron and Summer were making final preparations for their wedding.  Jeremy didn’t come.  It was a little quieter, but seemed to be fun.

The Party continued with the Carnival of the Damned.

There were too many choices.  They asked what was round them, and I listed several things that they could see.

  • A large tent with a painted heart on a sign
  • A large tent with a sign that says “petting zoo”
  • A tent where they can see a mirror through the front entrance
  • Two tents that have signs saying “Pie Eating Contest”
  • A tent with a sign saying “Snake Pit”
  • A tent that says “Feast of Kings”
    • Andy immediately says “It’s a cookbook!” as in To Serve Man
  • A large statue with a very large disk on top
    • Everyone assumes this is a Tilt-a-whirl
  • The top of a large wheel

So it takes about 5 minutes of bantering for the party to decide where they should go next.  They finally decide that they should go to the large tent with a painted heart on the sign.

As the party comes closer, they see that the tent has a boat floating on a stream that hovers above the ground.  The Party then spends quite a bit of time trying to figure out who should go into each boat.  Each boat in the love tunnel will hold two people.  Six members, two per boat.  You do the math, it takes about 5 minutes for the party to figure out what the optimal way to defend themselves from whatever the DM is going to throw at them… after all, nothing good can come from a “tunnel of love”

Mike and Andy go in the first boat.  Loren and Robert go in the middle boat.  Eric and Matthew go in the last.  The party starts down the tunnel.  The ride is quite comfortable.  They can see soft candles lighting the ride, but can’t see much to the sides or in front of them.  This of course makes the party nervous.  For some reason, they are convinced that bad things are going to happen.  After a little while, a small hatch opens up in the front of the boat, revealing a bottle of wine and two glasses.  It is pretty good wine.  Andy, being a dwarf wants nothing to do with it.

Then the party sees a bunch of cherub statues on either side of them, and they hear a fluttering sound.  The next thing they know, three cherubs fly close in and launch small arrows at the party.  Eric is struck, and has to make a will save.  He makes it, but he is convinced that Matthew stole his girlfriend, and he is angry about it, but Eric is able to deal with it.  At the same time, four zombies rise out of the water and attack.

Image result for evil cherub

Loren tries to turn the zombies.  Unfortunately for her, the zombies are higher hit dice than she can turn with her dice roll.  The zombies are more of a nuisance than anything else.  They attack and are able to bite Mike.  Mike fails his saving throw, and realizes that the zombie feasting on his shoulder feels absolutely amazing, in fact it is the most pleasurable feeling he has ever had in his life, and he is paralyzed, just enjoying it.

The party tries to go into full kill mode, but they realize that the ride has pinched their legs off with a bar across each of their laps.  Mayhem ensues.  The cherubs come back, and Loren tries a word of command to get them to leave.  No success.  They attack again, hitting Matthew, who, like Eric is convinced that Eric stole Matthew’s wife, but all he feels is resentment, not enough to kill Eric at this time, just enough to distract him from the melee.

More attacks.  Mike realizes that the zombie is chewing on him, and the pleasure wears off, leaving searing pain of being eaten alive.  Mike is paralyzed, but feels all of the pain.

Loren steps up and does a word of command that makes all three cherubs fly off.  Andy kills off the zombie attacking his boat.  The zombie attacking Mike finally dies from Andy’s actions.  Loren tries again to turn zombies, and turns two, leaving one attacking Eric and Matthew.  Matthew succumbs to the wonder feeling of being eaten alive, and Eric dispatches the zombie.

Now the party goes on the rest of the ride, and finally ends up where they started.  They find a case sealed with a magical glyph, along with two dead people lying near the entrance.  One is strangled.  The other has large chunks of meat ripped from the exposed skin.

The members are wary of the glyph on the sealed case.  Finally, they open it, finding an ivory violin, that looks the same as the violin that they observed in the film strips that they watched in the last session.  As they open up the case, an apparition appears, and forms into a beautiful woman, who mimes a thank you to the party, then disappears into a flurry of butterflies.

So what to do next?  Heal.  This is where we find out that the clerics have not been healing properly in the past.  The clerics had missed a minor point in the number of hit dice that each prayer heals.  The table allows for multiple hit dice, based on the roll and the alignment, but the total number of hit dice that can be repaired is the level of the cleric.  They were enjoying multiple hit dice with a single prayer, but in reality, they should have been rerolling for more than one hit die.

After some discussion, the party decided to go into the petting zoo.  After all, how bad could that be?

They enter, and find what appears to be a cow chained up to the wall.  Now it looks like a cow, but there are some odd things about this cow.  First, its skin is completely transparent, allowing the party to see the organs, muscles, bones etc.  Next, the udders are full, but they are full of what looks like multi colored milk.

Mike decides to milk the cow, and gets white milk.  He drinks it, and it is good milk.  He drinks half the milk, and feels really good.  Eric milks the cow, and gets blue milk.  When I drinks half the milk, he realizes that he has an amazing flow of consciousness, and would have any specific answer given to him.  Unfortunately for him, he asks generic questions, and gets nothing useful from either dose.

This is where Andy comes into his own.  He decides that this cow is too good to leave here, and he takes out his battle ax to cut the chain holding the cow in place.  Unfortunately, no one checked for glyphs, wards or traps.  So when Andy’s ax strikes the chain, a huge white / blue bolt of energy travels down the chain and kills the cow.  They decide to skin the cow, because obviously a transparent skin of a cow would make armor that would make the wearer invisible, right?  Maybe, maybe not.

Now, I was hoping that the party would milk the cow a few more times.  The color of the milk is completely random.  If they had gotten black milk, then the party member drinking it would have grown a second head, which was argumentative and would be a general pain in the butt to everyone.  The good part of the second head would have been that the extra head would have had second sight, and be able to provide information once per day on a d14 roll on the Second Sight spell table.  The second head also had night vision / infra vision to 60-ft.  If they had rolled and gotten yellow milk and drank it, then the unfortunate party member would have painfully laid three golden eggs worth 50 gp apiece in the next hour.

But that is the fickleness of dice.

After that, Eric noticed that the walls of the petting zoo are made of bales of hay.  So Eric, being a thief climbs up to the top of the hay bale wall, and spies what is on the other side of the wall.  Now Eric really rolls terribly on his sneak roll.  I explain that he is a city halfling, and has never climbed around on stacks of hay bales.  He doesn’t realize that they are stacked with air spaces between some of the bales, and slips into one of the air spaces.  Since he is a halfling, that means that he is up to his hip in between the hay bale.

Then he gets bucked across the room.  A giant two headed goat attacks the hay bales, and Eric sails 30 feet to land on hay bales on the other side of the cow enclosure, and is prone.

Image result for two headed goat

Now I ask for everyone to roll initiative.  They do, and the goat does well.  While the party is trying to figure out what to do I scan ahead on the encounter and realize that this is pretty awesome…  The encounter gets better and better, I laugh and chuckle to myself, and Loren, Eric and Mike decide that is not a good thing.

The encounter goes on for a while, and the goat tosses party members around.  Eric gets in back of the goat and backstabs it.  The goat turns around and knocks him into the wall again.  Eventually the goat is killed.

We end the game for the evening, and are going to pick it up next week.